“How special,” I murmur. “I love being the first,” I purr.
For the fourth time tonight I stand in front of a young man, barely 21, experiencing his initiation into the adult world. For the fourth time tonight I am someone’s first. It’s amazing, even to me. Tonight my name should be Cherry Pop.
I do love being the first. Maybe it’s because there are very little expectations from someone who hasn’t experienced something before. Or perhaps it’s the sweet wide-eyed stare and fresh expression on their faces. Or the thrill of excitement I can feel running along the current between us. It’s honest and raw, and reminds me that even though I have done this hundreds of times before, there is still something new to be had here.
Absolutely anything can become the object of meditation. Breath. Body sensations. The taste of that drink, the sounds of the space– the laughter, the music, the curve of one’s lips. The meditative mind can perceive that everything is arising and passing away, that really everything is new.
I have learned the discipline of the hustle, the effortless effort it takes to give and receive, to know that everything and nothing is happening at the same time. Yes, even in six-inch heels and a string bikini, I can ride the present moment flow. And hopping on, I can relax. The dance is a dance.
I am present. And knowing I’m not going anywhere, I can relax. I can listen. I can enjoy it. I take in the composition of the room, see where I am needed. Entering the space, I change it. I explore. I am curious. I watch the feedback I get. I see how I balance the system.
Yes, I am at work to make money. That is not a question; this is a livelihood. Yet, bringing a quiet and supple mind to my work changes everything.
Suddenly this arena becomes fresh. All along it has been new. Crazy enlightened things become possible when we ride the energy of the present moment, follow it without agenda or expectation. Lust. Play. Love. All arising and passing away, like for the first time. I give something special, and I receive something special in return.
Or maybe I just love being the favorite. There’s that, too.
